


Simple Instincts

by Cameo (CameoSF)



Category: seaQuest
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-03
Updated: 2014-05-03
Packaged: 2018-01-21 19:41:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1561751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CameoSF/pseuds/Cameo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clay Marshall's psychic attack on Lucas has unforeseen consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Simple Instincts

**Author's Note:**

> Set immediately after the 2nd season episode ‘Siamese Dream’.

_The world had turned red around him, and Lucas could no longer tell if he was still on his feet or helpless on the floor. He clutched his head, willing Marshall to let up, to give him a chance to fight back. The psychic's mental strength was immense: Lucas felt his power drilling into his mind, ripping through the barriers he tried to build around the warhead codes. He couldn't hear now either, but he had no doubts that Marshall had already determined several of the numbers. His mental defenses were falling one by one. If anything less than the seaQuest were at stake, Lucas would have given up, just to make the pain stop, but he couldn't let this madman access the missiles. He had to guard the codes… Protect his friends… Protect his own mind from the vicious assault… Block his thoughts… Block all thoughts._

_Suddenly the agony was gone._

 

Captain Nathan Bridger gave a silent sigh of relief to see Lucas safely removed from the missile bay, but he had too many other responsibilities to accompany the unconscious boy to the infirmary. Between authorizing repairs to the missile hold and taking statements from his crew about their part in the near-disaster, it was a couple of hours before he was able to stop by Dr. Smith's domain. There he was satisfied to see Dagwood sitting obediently on one of the beds and asking why he had to stay there; nearly being blown up had barely fazed the genetically engineered fellow. Lucas was another story however, and Wendy could only shrug.

"I'm reluctant to read him," the doctor admitted, her voice almost steady. Nathan would have suggested she take some time off to recover from her own confrontation with Marshall, but he guessed she preferred to distract herself with work. "I don't know how much damage Clay did to his psyche, but Lucas is bound to be fragile for a while."

Nathan studied her patient, frowning. The boy was pale and hardly seemed to be breathing. "He's not in a coma, is he?"

"I don't think so. My educated guess is that he'll be able to repair his mind more quickly while he sleeps. He'll wake in his own time."

"All right. Keep me informed."

Nathan went to his cabin, torn over whether he should notify Lucas’s father of his son's condition. If the boy was seriously injured he would have no choice, even if it meant that Dr. Wolenczak might remove Lucas from the boat. In the end, Nathan opted to wait and see how his young friend progressed before making any drastic decisions.

 

_The light and noise woke him. The cave was unfamiliar: too bright, too cold. Too many strange animals surrounded him, without fur but with thin, colorful skins and sharp shiny claws. In the huge hard cave, there was nowhere to hide. So he did the only thing he could._

 

Wendy's call woke Nathan from a deep sleep. He answered the commlink, instantly fearing the worst. The doctor's words didn't reassure him.

"Nathan? Can you come to Medbay at once? It's Lucas--"

The captain didn't waste time asking questions; he threw on a robe and was out the door of his cabin before she'd finished her sentence.

Medbay was normally the quietest place on the seaQuest, but when Nathan hurried in, it more closely resembled a drunk tank. Two interns were wrestling with someone in baggy scrubs who kicked and scratched and bit until one then the other let go. They stood back, watching their captain warily. Nathan froze at the sight of Lucas crouched on the floor, snarling at everyone in the room indiscriminately.

"Wendy?" he began carefully. "What's going on here?"

The doctor had the faraway look on her face that meant she was scanning someone. After a tense moment, she started and focused on Nathan, a bit breathless. "He's not there," she whispered. Familiar with her tendency toward melodrama, Nathan waited for her to elaborate. "All I could sense is… fear. Instinct. No reason at all."

Nathan's heart skipped a beat. "Are you saying he has brain damage?"

"No, I don't think so. I didn't find damage, I found… nothing. It's as if his higher thought functions have retreated so deeply they’re… unreachable." Her baby-doll eyes were huge. "It might be a defensive measure--"

She broke off at a growl from Lucas. During the lull, Dagwood had gone over and knelt beside him, which Lucas did not take kindly to. He swiped at the huge GELF when Dagwood attempted to touch him, and when that had no effect, made a sudden break for it. The interns were not quick enough to grab him.

"Lucas!" Nathan called, automatically following the boy into the corridor. He saw Lucas hesitate in confusion at the stairwell, then disappear downward. Nathan paused at the rail to let Wendy catch up. "I need your prognosis, Doctor,” he said urgently. “Is he a threat to himself or to the boat?"

"Not deliberately."

"Will he heal?"

"I think so. The mind is an incredible machine, capable of things we can't even imagine--"

Nathan exercised patience. "Agreed, and Lucas’s mind is one of the finest. In your medical opinion, will he be able to come back from this?"

She nodded. "Yes."

"Is there anything we can do to help him?"

"If you mean to hurry it along, no. Further intrusion into his mind might only make it worse."

The captain considered his options quickly. "Can you estimate how long he'll be like this?"

Now she shook her head with equal decisiveness. "It depends how deeply he's retreated. Clay's attack lasted a long time, psychically speaking, and Lucas hasn’t been trained to protect himself. It had to take a major effort of will to block his mind that completely, prompted by incredible terror and strain--" Wendy broke off with an uncertain look at Nathan's expression. Her tone softened. "He's an amazing boy, Nathan. If he had the strength to hide from Clay's assault, he'll have the strength to come out of hiding as soon as he feels safe."

"Then how do we make him feel safe?" Nathan asked, but he knew what her answer would be.

"If he's operating on nothing but instinct, then he doesn't know who we are or what we want. He's afraid of us. We have to assure him that we mean him no harm."

"Easier said than done."

"Unfortunately," she agreed. "We can't confine him to quarters or he'll feel trapped."

"So we let him run free and hope he doesn't hurt himself." Nathan started down the stairs. "Thank you, Doctor. Get some rest. I may need you later."

 

_Strange animals everywhere, reaching for him, making noises at him. The tunnels never seemed to end, and they never reached daylight. Lucas kept running, dodging the furless creatures, sometimes slipping behind shiny, oddly shaped rocks, in search of a dark place to hide. At one point he smelled food, but the aroma led him to a herd of the noisy animals, so he went another way. He was tired and thirsty when he spotted the smooth animal, not at all like the others, swimming inside the wall of the cave._

 

"Captain, we have him on video," Commander Ford announced the minute Nathan stepped onto the bridge. After dressing, the latter had spent several anxious hours in his ready room fielding reports from his crew about Lucas’s whereabouts and his bizarre reactions to their presence. Finally he’d given a general order that no one approach the boy, instead having Lieutenant O'Neill track Lucas on the security cameras. When the latter at last seemed to settle, Ford had notified him. Now the Commander added evenly, "He's with Darwin on sea-deck."

Nathan didn't bother to hide his relief at spotting Lucas safe and sound on the screen. At some point he'd discarded his scrubs, and for a moment, seeing the boy in shorts petting the dolphin he loved, Nathan almost believed all was back to normal. Then Lucas dipped his hand into the pool and scooped some salt water to his mouth. He drank, choked, and abruptly crumpled to the floor, his shoulders shaking. As Nathan watched in dismay, Lucas crawled along the side of Darwin's tank till he could curl up between it and a rack of deep-sea diving equipment.

"Captain," Tony Piccolo suddenly spoke up from behind them, "permission to go get him out of there."

"Sorry, Ensign."

"He's a friend--"

"I know that, but he wouldn't recognize you." Nathan had simply told the crew that Lucas was disoriented due to his mental clash with Marshall. No one, not even Ford, had questioned his decision to give a confused boy free run of the boat. "Your concern is noted, and I'm sure Lucas will appreciate it when he's himself again."

"If he's not himself, who is he?" Dagwood asked innocently, joining them by the screen. When Nathan turned to reply, he noted that everyone on the bridge was waiting for the answer.

"According to Dr. Smith, Lucas isn't really anyone at the moment. He was forced to bury his higher thought functions to protect them from Marshall's attack, and until he believes it’s safe to bring them out, he is little more than primal instinct." Nathan met one pair of eyes after another, making sure his core staff realized they were being given sensitive information. "I don't want this becoming general knowledge. Lucas is too vulnerable right now, and he’ll have a hard enough time dealing with this once he’s recovered, without the whole crew knowing.”

"He's scared of us?" Dagwood guessed.

"Yes, he's scared, and all we can do is try not to scare him more." Nathan glanced at Piccolo, who still looked stubborn. "If I think of a way for you to help, Piccolo, I'll call you."

"Yes, sir."

The captain turned back to the screen, from which he could hear quiet sobs coming from behind the dolphin tank. Darwin, hopefully offering a fish that Lucas didn't even see, looked just as helpless as Nathan felt.

"Piccolo, I've thought of a way."

 

_He was so hungry, and suddenly food appeared near the cave opening. Lucas crawled out of his corner to snatch it, and while he wasn't sure what it was, it tasted good, and there was fresh water too. There were no noisy animals around, and somehow having the smooth animal nearby made him feel better. Calmer now, he squirmed back into his nook and settled down to sleep._

 

In his cabin after dinner, Nathan couldn't stop watching his vidscreen, unconsciously awaiting a miracle. There was no reason to expect Lucas to recover the minute his physical needs were met, but Nathan found it hard to pull his eyes away in case he missed the moment Lucas’s mind returned. The instant it did, Nathan planned to head for sea-deck and reassure the boy that all was well. For all he knew, Lucas might believe that Marshall had succeeded in activating the warheads, and Nathan couldn't let him suffer that delusion an instant longer than necessary.

The night passed slowly. Nathan eventually changed into his sleepwear: well-worn shorts and t-shirt. He wondered whether Lucas was cold, and called engineering to have them raise the temperature in the Moon Pool area. Soon thereafter he had them turn the lights down a little.

At three in the morning, unable to sleep, Nathan went down there himself.

 

_There was another animal in the cave. Lucas peered cautiously around the side of the hard pool, relieved to find his refuge darker and warmer than it had been when he dozed off. The animal was one of the furless ones, but it wasn't making noise, and it wasn't threatening him. As Lucas watched, the animal crawled slowly into the cave, apparently unaware of him, sniffing the walls as if checking for danger. When it approached the pool, the smooth animal in the water seemed to welcome it, so Lucas decided not to fear it. He returned to his corner, and wasn't surprised when the animal presently found its way there as well. It sniffed him and let him sniff it, then lay down beside him. When it snuggled close, Lucas let it, and soon sank back into sleep._

 

Nathan knew he could be seen on the security cameras, but he didn't care. His presence seemed to be helping Lucas, and that was all that mattered at the moment. Once he knew that the boy was safe in his arms, he was able to sleep too.

He was awoken when Lucas suddenly pulled away, first darting deeper into his corner, then shoving his way directly through the diving gear piled on the nearby rack. Amid the crash of tanks hitting the floor, Nathan sat up, and only then noticed Commander Ford standing in the doorway. The latter had to step aside quickly or be bowled over by the panicked boy, who then took off down the corridor.

“I’m sorry, sir,” Ford said blandly. “I couldn’t reach you by commlink, and Secretary General Noyce is calling. He wants a report on Marshall’s activities here.”

Nathan rubbed his face, rapidly prioritizing his responsibilities. His report to the UEO was overdue, and as far as he was concerned, it could remain overdue. Lucas was a minor, a civilian, and a valuable asset to the service; once they learned of his condition, the boy would be removed from the seaQuest as fast as the vessel could reach port. Nathan wasn’t going to allow that to happen. He’d harbored a small hope that Lucas would be himself once he got a full night’s rest. Although that hadn’t occurred, Nathan was not ready to abandon his young friend to strangers.

“Tell Secretary General Noyce I’ll get back to him,” he instructed his second in command as he got to his feet. “And have Lieutenant O’Neill resume tracking Lucas via security cam.”

“He never stopped, sir.”

“Good. I’ll see you on the bridge in twenty minutes.”

It was several more hours before Lucas re-settled, this time in a supply room used to store dry food. Unfortunately, some of that food would be needed by the cooks for crew lunches, so it wasn’t possible to leave him there. After watching Lucas attempt to eat uncooked pasta from a bin, Nathan called on Piccolo again.

“Lucas is here,” Nathan told him, indicating the supply room on a plan of the boat. Where his finger touched, the screen glowed white. “I’d like him to be here.” He tapped another storage room at the other end of the corridor where the boy wouldn’t be disturbed any time soon. A red line now connected the two on the screen. “Do you think you can lure him there without spooking him?”

“Is he hungry? Stupid question.” Piccolo grinned, eager to help and not just because it got him out of his regular duties. “Just gimme time to round up some pizza.”

“I’ll have the area kept clear. Be careful with him.”

“Yes, sir. You can count on me.”

Nathan let him go, and soon thereafter saw Piccolo appear in the doorway of Lucas’s refuge. Staying out of sight of the boy, he set down a plate with a single narrow slice of steaming pizza, sliding it just inside the room. On another camera Nathan saw Lucas’s antennae go up as the smell reached him. He was clearly torn whether to investigate or to stay hidden; when his stomach won the debate, Nathan smiled. Primal or not, the appetite of a teen-aged boy gave them a way to help him.

Piccolo waited till Lucas had eaten the first slice, then set another slice down a couple yards outside the room. When Lucas didn’t move, the crafty young man began making lip-smacking noises. After a few minutes, Lucas peeked out, whereupon Piccolo ducked into another doorway. When Lucas finally ventured out and started devouring the pizza, Piccolo set down the next piece. In all it took ten minutes and eight slices of pizza to get Lucas to the other storeroom, where a large bowl of water awaited him. Lucas went in and, as Nathan had hoped, chose to stay there.

After that Nathan was able to get some work done. He wrote up the report that Bill Noyce wanted, although the version he transmitted was severely truncated. He also met with Dr. Smith to see whether she had any additional advice on Lucas’s state, but other than shore-leave once the seaQuest reached harbor, the psychic had nothing further to recommend.

Lucas did not leave the storeroom for the rest of the day, as Nathan could attest since he was never far from a vidscreen. The boy slept for a bit, then apparently got restless and rummaged through the supplies kept there. Soap and shampoo meant nothing to him, but he did eventually come upon a cache of extra towels which he pulled out of their carton and dropped on the floor as a sloppy sort of pallet. That gave Nathan his next idea.

 

_The cave was quiet. Even from inside his burrow, he’d been able to hear the constant noise of the animals, but finally they seemed to have gone away. The tunnel outside was empty. Lucas was just bracing himself to go out and forage, when a wonderful aroma wafted his direction. The food he’d eaten earlier had been extremely satisfying, but this made him salivate all over again. Peering around the corner of the cave, he saw something small and golden lying on the ground. It looked like a stick, but it was soft, and when he ate it, his stomach requested more. That was when he noticed a trail of the golden objects leading towards one of the holes in the ground with the flat oddly-leveled rocks._

 

Nathan had never been gladder that everyone on board knew what foods Lucas favored. Healthy fare be-damned; french fries were apparently enough to conquer the boy’s hesitance. As Nathan watched, holding his breath, Lucas followed the fragrant trail to the stairwell, then actually climbed up to the next level. He paused there, and for a moment Nathan was afraid he’d bolt again, but the corridor was empty, as the captain had ordered, and the fries were still enticing. Lucas gobbled them up right to the door of Nathan’s cabin.

There he stopped. Through the open door Nathan could see him eyeing the rest of the trail, but evidently his hunger was now ready to bow to his distrust. The lights in the cabin were turned low, and Nathan had spread a couple of spare UEO blankets on the floor beside the bed. While Lucas waffled just outside the room, the captain lay down on the blankets, his back to the door. He pretended to relax and doze, and finally, silently, Lucas entered the cabin. After sniffing the occupant to confirm his identity, the boy lay down behind him. At took a while, but at last Lucas too relaxed and snuggled close. Nathan knew when he sank into sleep.

Again next morning, despite Nathan’s hopes, there was no discernable change in his friend. Lucas moved away from him the minute Nathan stirred, but at least he didn’t leave the room. Instead he crouched under the desk, eyeing the captain steadily. After an internal debate, Nathan decided his cabin might be the best place for the boy, so he dressed and went about his business, merely making a point of leaving the door halfway open.

To his relief, when he returned at lunchtime Lucas was still there, asleep once more on the blankets. Nathan had brought food, which he set down nearby; as Wendy had suggested, sleep might be the greatest healer in Lucas’s case, and Nathan wasn’t about to disturb him. He was perfectly happy to vacate his space for the remainder of the day.

He was late getting back due to another political crisis on the high seas. Several times Nathan came close to telling the delegates involved to work it out for themselves, but he knew that would come back to bite him on the ass later. At least his mediation could be performed via commlink rather than in person.

Around ten o’clock ship’s time, he wearily entered his cabin, and was gratified to see that Lucas did not run away from him. The boy was sitting on the blankets, the empty lunch plate beside him. He tensed when Nathan closed the door, but relaxed again as soon as the captain set a couple of cheeseburgers on the plate. He began wolfing them down, never taking his gaze from his host. Up close, Nathan realized how unnerving it was to see no trace of intelligence in the wary blue eyes.

“Lucas?” he said softly. His friend frowned, but kept eating. “Do you know who I am?”

That got no response. Sighing, Nathan undressed and sat on his cot, watching the boy speculatively. He had no particular desire to spend another night on the floor; fit he certainly was, but after a while, old bones objected to metal surfaces. Curious how far Lucas was willing to trust him, Nathan lay back, stretched, and gave a little sound of deep contentment. He wriggled a bit to make it clear how comfortable the bed was, then turned out the light. Then he waited.

 

_The animal had not harmed him. It had provided him food, and although he was now confined with it, he didn’t feel threatened. In fact, he missed the warmth of the animal next to him. The skins it was laying on looked softer than the ground. Tentatively, prepared to flee if necessary, Lucas climbed up beside him. The animal didn’t push him away, just shifted slightly to allow him room to lie down. Lucas did so, comfortable with the animal’s smell now, and ready to sleep. As he drifted off, it occurred to him that this animal was definitely male._

 

Nathan came wide awake when Lucas started humping his leg. The boy was still asleep, but evidently, now that he no longer feared his companion, other basic instincts were kicking in. Nathan wasn’t sure if this should be considered progress or not: dealing calmly with Lucas when he was frightened or hungry was difficult enough; dealing with a teen-aged animal in heat was going to take an entirely different sort of self-control, a sort that Nathan had believed behind him.

He wasn’t immune to Lucas’s appeal, hadn’t been since he’d first met the young scientist nearly two years earlier. As Nathan had gotten to know the boy, he’d determined to become a father figure to him, for Lucas’s sake and for his own, because there was no question that any other relationship was a bad idea. Lucas had seemed to appreciate having him there in lieu of his own dad, and every time he approached Nathan for advice or just to share some bit of personal information, Nathan had silently congratulated himself on his own acting ability. It had become slightly harder when Lucas turned eighteen a few months before, but overall, the captain figured he had successfully sublimated his attraction to the kid.

Of course, it had helped to know that Lucas didn’t return his interest. Nathan had wondered a few times whether the boy might be bisexual, but he’d never let himself contemplate anything further. The last thing he’d expected was to be the object of Lucas’s unconscious desire. Worse, his drowsy body had decided it was up for reciprocating.

“Lucas?” he whispered. The boy merely pressed closer, his movements growing more urgent. Nathan clenched his hands and held himself still until Lucas came with a groan, all without waking. Afterwards, despite Lucas’s face buried in his neck, Nathan concentrated on willing his own erection to recede. Lucas might never know how the captain reacted, but Nathan would know, and he refused to compound it by actually climaxing.

He got a little more sleep before morning, and awoke when Lucas left his side. The boy had been wearing nothing but shorts for the last few days, so neither they nor he were particularly fresh at that point. Banking on his staff leaving them alone a while longer, Nathan decided it would be prudent to get the kid cleaned up. He therefore went into his private head and turned on the shower.

As anticipated, the sound of falling water drew Lucas into the smaller room. He tried drinking it at first, and Nathan let him discover for himself that the seaQuest’s washing water was not potable. It was warm, however, so when Nathan stripped and stepped in, Lucas joined him without hesitation. After that, the hard part was getting him out. He especially seemed to enjoy soaking his unruly blond hair then shaking it like a dog, which Nathan found amusing at first. When Lucas’s simple pleasure morphed into something more physical, Nathan left him there to handle it. The kid came out of the shower clean, so it didn’t matter how he’d gotten that way. Unfortunately he showed no inclination to put his shorts back on, and Nathan was in no frame of mind to do it for him.

By then the captain was in uniform and ready to go to the Bridge. For an awkward minute it looked like Lucas would follow, but as soon as the door opened, the usual sounds of the busy vessel reached them. With a frustrated pout, Lucas retreated back beneath the desk. Encouraged, Nathan resumed his duties, leaving the door only a few inches ajar.

 

_He knew he could get out if he wanted, but the cave he was in was safe and comfortable, so Lucas stayed there. The other animal came back a few times, bringing food. Other animals passed by in the tunnel outside, but none intruded on his space. He slept for a while, and examined the incomprehensible rocks and trees in the cave, but there was little else to do. After one of the rocks made a sharp unpleasant noise when he touched it, Lucas stopped exploring and waited impatiently for his animal to return._

 

It was another long day for Nathan. The seaQuest was scheduled to dock in Pearl in two days’ time, where she would take aboard a party of Australasian ambassadors bound for home. Besides having to arrange for their arrival and transportation, the captain was expected, while socializing with them during the trip, to discreetly impress upon them what a fast and powerful boat they were on. That meant ensuring the seaQuest was in tip-top condition, and that required Nathan’s time and attention as well as that of his entire crew.

It didn’t help that he had yet to inform his superiors of Lucas’s condition. Commander Ford and the other members of his senior staff hadn’t commented, but he could see them wondering how long he was going to wait. They hadn’t laid eyes on Lucas for a couple of days, but Dr. Smith mentioned that she’d scanned the boy that morning and couldn’t detect any change. The others must assume Nathan was wasting his times and Lucas’s, thereby preventing their friend from getting the professional care he needed.

“What do you think?” Nathan murmured when they were finally closed in his cabin for the night. Lucas looked up from a plate of tacos. “Am I harming you by keeping you here? Am I being selfish for wanting to be the one to help you?”

He got no verbal response, but Lucas actually set down his dinner. He crept closer, sniffing Nathan curiously. Till then it had been random scenting, but this time Lucas seemed to zero in on the captain’s crotch, which had been a problem most of the day. Although his work had kept his mind off what had occurred the night before, his body had stubbornly retained the memory. The instant Lucas was close enough to rub his nose against Nathan’s slacks, Nathan was hard. The boy was equally aroused in less time than it took Nathan to pull away.

“I suppose I should take that as a ‘yes’,” he added glumly.

Lucas was without doubt a beautiful kid. He would someday make a handsome man, but at eighteen he hadn’t yet lost the prettiness of his youth. Somewhere along the way he’d grown an inch or two taller than Nathan, and the latter had frequently had to remind himself that didn’t mean the boy’s maturity had kept pace. Lucas was brilliant, but experience-wise, he was a child. It was all Nathan could do not to forget that.

“When we reach Pearl,” he concluded quietly, “I’ll contact your father and we’ll find a hospital that can help you.” Lucas tried to nuzzle him, forcing Nathan to hold him off. “I’m sorry.”

He ducked into the head, shutting the door before Lucas could follow. For once Nathan was glad the other didn’t know how to use a handle.

When he emerged a while later, Lucas had finished his dinner and was waiting expectantly on the bed. He was no longer erect, but Nathan wasn’t taking any chances: he dug out an old pair of sweats and put them on. When he lay down, he deliberately stayed as near the edge of the mattress as he could without falling off. Lucas seemed confused for a moment, but when nudging his bedmate had no effect, he finally settled down to sleep.

 

_There was warmth beside him, and a familiar smell that instantly made him hard. Lucas was only half conscious, but his body was awake enough to indulge itself, even though its bed-mate wasn’t participating. He came with a gasp, then frowned when the man beside him stirred in his sleep and pulled him closer, allowing Lucas to both see his face and to feel his erection. Sudden realization woke him up like a splash of icy water._

 

Nathan knew as soon as he awoke that he’d climaxed during the night. Lucas was curled up in his arms, and clearly the boy had also experienced some nocturnal emissions. With an internal groan Nathan consigned his own good intentions to hell; he had no excuse not to let someone else try to help Lucas. Keeping him to himself, pretending he wasn’t enjoying the physical contact, was hypocritical and possibly reprehensible, and he had to put an end to it before Lucas regained his faculties, or the boy might never trust him again.

“Let’s get cleaned up,” Nathan muttered when he saw Lucas’s eyes open. The unmistakable intelligence in them made him freeze.

“That was weird,” Lucas said slowly, meeting his gaze. “How long was I… out of it?”

“Four days,” Nathan told him, beginning to inch out of the bed. He saw no way to explain his behavior other than to admit he’d taken advantage of a confused friend. “Dr. Smith thinks you sent your higher brain functions into hiding to guard them from Marshall’s psychic attack. We hoped you’d be able to come out of it by yourself—“

“Yeah.” Lucas caught his arm and pulled him back, apparently unfazed by their location. “I guess I did.”

“What do you remember?”

Now Lucas’s brow wrinkled. “Not much…   No, everything, except mostly through senses, not… brainpower. I remember being scared, and hungry and thirsty and cold. I remember not understanding where I was. Or who any of you were.”

Nathan had one foot on the floor, but he stayed close since that was what the other wanted. “We tried to make you feel safe.”

“It worked. I felt perfectly safe with you.” Lucas’s blue eyes cleared. “I always have.”

Until that moment, Nathan would have said he was incapable of blushing. He gently freed his arm and stood up. “Let’s get you to Medbay. Dr. Smith will want to scan you.”

“Not yet.”

“She knows how to avoid harming you—“

“No, I mean…” Lucas sat up cross-legged and used both hands to brush messy hair back from his face. “I mean, let’s not go yet. I want to say something.” Nathan braced himself, but Lucas seemed anxious rather than angry or upset. “At night, while you were asleep, I kept getting horny. But I guess you figured that out.” He turned slightly pink, but didn’t back down. “The thing is, I know you were too—“

“Lucas—“

“Let me finish. You can say it was just biological or something, but I don’t believe it.”

“What do you mean?”

“If it was just biological, you would have done something about it. But you didn’t, so it had to be more than that. You let me keep humping you, when you didn’t have to. Or you could have humped back—“

“Lucas—“

The boy was almost scarlet now. “But you could have done something, and you didn’t.”

“It would have been extremely inappropriate,” Nathan stated, hoping that could be the end of the subject.

“Until last night. You were asleep when I came. And you were hard, and you let me touch you. You seemed to like it.”

The captain managed to speak evenly, but it was definitely time to put some distance between them. “I apologize if I gave you the wrong idea.”

“No, don’t apologize. I wanted to.” Lucas scrambled off the bed and followed Nathan to the doorway of the head. “Captain. Let me say this. I fell asleep thinking about it.” He hung on the open door, as if unsure whether he should presume to come in. Nathan ordered himself to stop retreating and let the kid say his piece; after all, the situation could hardly get any more awkward. “You wouldn’t have sex with me when you were conscious, but when you were unconscious, it was what you wanted too.”

“That doesn’t mean—“

“When I was unconscious, and by that I mean without conscious thought, I wasn’t afraid of you. It was instinctual. You did whatever you had to, to make me feel safe, even sleeping on the floor. I knew I didn’t have to fear you, and once I had the chance… I acted on what I felt. On what I’ve been feeling.” When Nathan didn’t shut him out of the room, Lucas went on. He didn’t look nearly as confident as he sounded, but neither did he look like the diffident kid he’d been before his run-in with Marshall. “After you climaxed last night, you held on to me. And not like some animal… Like a lover.” He waited, but Nathan was somewhat stunned. “I figured, to have done all that for me, you must love me an awful lot.”

“Of course I do.”

“And not like a father.”

Nathan studied him for a minute, tempted beyond all good sense to tell him the truth: that the last thing he felt toward the young man standing naked in front of him was paternal. He now knew what it was like to hold him and to watch him climax, and he had a very good idea what Lucas would look like in the throes of real passion. More than anything, Nathan wanted it to occur with him.

He reached out to stroke Lucas’s cheek, and the other moved into his touch like a trusting animal.

“Are you sure about this?” Nathan asked, but he no longer felt like the only responsible adult involved. Lucas answered by stepping closer. “I’m old enough—“

“To be able to teach me stuff.”

The captain smiled. “Oh, I suspect you’ll find plenty to teach me too.”

They ended up in the shower together, washing each other thoroughly. Afterwards they returned to the bed and made love, ignoring the time. Presently they’d have to leave the cabin so that Lucas’s recovery could be fussed over, but most of the crew would probably be so relieved to have their young scientist restored, they wouldn’t think twice about what might have triggered it. Of course, as soon as Dr. Smith scanned Lucas, their secret would be out. Then again, since she was psychic, maybe she'd seen it coming all along.

 

 


End file.
